How To Survive (And Thrive!) As A Work At Home Mom

Last week we chatted a bit about balance when it comes to life as a WAHM. After seeing some of your comments, I decided to stretch out my social media feelers to find out what some of my Twitter and Facebook pals had to offer in terms of advice for surviving (and thriving!) in a work from home environment.

Here’s what they had to say:

@MamaAndDoula tweeted: Set boundaries, many people assume I can drop my work to help them out, often I can but hate it being assumed, WAH is still work.

@gerlaugh offered: Set clear boundaries for work/play time, you’ll stress if you let that balance slide.

I’m sensing a trend! Boundaries (mental and physical) are certainly important to separating your mom-self and your business-self. While a mixing of the two is inevitable at some point, it’s best to keep them separate, but friendly! You don’t want your “selves” wrapped up in a struggle for attention.

@Bellabirth shared a tweet about just this: Time management! Set aside time to just do work and just do fam stuff, I got snowed when I intermingled the two.

It’s all about keeping a bit of distance between those two lives, yet doing so in a way which doesn’t create jealousy, frustration or resentment.

From Stephanie A: Have an office space with a door! And your PC should not function as a family comp. And make a to-do list each morning! These are my needs!

From Jill SK: Now that the kids are older, I have “office hours”… that means do not disturb mommy until 5:00 unless you or a sibling is on fire. Of course I am here if they need me, but they do not need to be under my feet every second of the day.

Another common theme that popped up was the idea of having an actual, physical space where you can can conduct your business, sans interruption. For example, in our house, my partner and I both share an office, and while our two year old isn’t 100% put off by a closed door, I can ofter hear her on the other side telling daddy, “Mama’s at work!”

A tip from Jill S: Have a schedule and a sense of humour….included in this schedule is when to STOP working each day – I find some nights I keep going after Charlie (daughter) goes to bed, rather than relaxing and taking time for me.

This piece of advice is so important. How many nights have you found yourself wide awake and working away into the wee hours of the morning? I know I’ve been guilty of this myself. Sometimes I feel as though I should be DOING something 24/7, and guilty if I sit down to spend time on myself  instead. If you have to, ask your partner or a friend to talk to you, or call you, every now and again to say, “Sit down, have a cup of tea, enjoy a moment of quiet, read a favourite book, watch something mindless on TV.” We all deserve moments of nothingness. It’s good for the soul, and you’d be surprised how refreshed you feel after an hour (or 20 minutes!) of R&R.

One last bit of wisdom:

Lacey M says: Go with the flow! Or you’ll stress yourself out!

Absolutely!

As moms I think we try very hard to control certain aspects of our lives so that they don’t get out of hand,but all to often it’s the tight rein we’re struggling to maintain which ends up constricting us and sucking the enjoyment out of life!

Know that you’re doing your best and be forgiving if things don’t turn out perfectly. Remember that a being happy mama is one of the best gifts we can give our children! We want to look back at these years with happiness and satisfaction — no regrets, no “if only”s!

Take care of yourself, know when to create boundaries and when all else fails, keep smiling and don’t give up!

Wishing you all a fabulously productive day!

Share your WAHM savvy tips in the comments! We’d love to hear from you!

…

Desiree Fawn is a blogger/doula from Ontario where she lives with her partner & daughter.
She blogs at So Fawned.
Follow @sofawned on Twitter!

Photo via My Girl Thursday.

Business Tips…by a new MomPreneur – PART I

Make Networking Meaningful

When I first started selling on Etsy, I noticed that a lot of other sellers mentioned teams in their shop announcements. Some people were on local “street teams” – others were on teams organized by craft. Artfire has something similar, called Guilds. I was looking for a way to get my name out there, so I decided to investigate.

One of the products I sell is personalized/initial jewelry for moms. So, I thought it would be only natural to seek out mom-related “teams” on Etsy – thinking I’d find my target market right there. And while I did learn some very interesting tips (I’ll be sharing one in particular in my next article!) the group itself wasn’t quite the right fit for me. So I sought out a few more.

Two months later, some of those groups STILL haven’t contacted me back. In the meantime, I’ve kept searching. One group got back to me right away – I jumped in, and I’m so glad I did.

When I set out to find a team on Etsy, I did it with sales and targeted audiences in mind. To date, I haven’t had any sales within my group (I did make one trade!) but I have gained so much more. Etsy’s Team CAC discussion thread is one of my first stops each morning and one of the last stops I make at the end of my day.

The reason I keep going back is that selling online is HARD WORK, but within that team I can find a great deal of support and feedback. There are people there who I can celebrate with when I do get sales, and people who can pick me back up when I’m feeling discouraged. And we’re ALL thinking of ways to support and promote each other – something you definitely need to succeed when you’re selling online.

Getting into a team, guild or group is something I’d recommend to any online seller. Here are my suggestions for making it work for you:

• If you’re on Etsy or Artfire, start with their internal message boards. The people there know exactly what you’re going through.
• If you’re solo, check out Yahoo! Groups, Café Handmade, Ning and other social networking sites. If you have a suggestion for a site not mentioned here, put it in the comments so others can find it!
• Shop around. Check out multiple groups. You may not find your fit right away.
• Remember, it’s a TWO-WAY (or four-way…or ten-way…conversation). You can’t just drop in, promote yourself, and walk out and wait for the sales. If you only talk about yourself, you’re really just teaching people to ignore your posts.
• Remember that age-old rule from junior high – if you want to make friends, you have to BE a friend. It’s very, very easy to feel ignored online. Don’t take it personally! You have to work at your online friendships, just as you would in your “real-world” ones.

When it comes to networking through teams, groups and guilds, the payoff can be much more rewarding than money. You can find mentoring relationships, emotional support, honest feedback and plenty of other value that make message boards worth your time. Just make sure to budget your time – so that your chatting doesn’t take away from your business.

Heck, you might even find some sales. While I haven’t sold to the people I’ve networked with, I have bought from them. And when Christmas comes around, I already know where I’m getting a lot of gifts. Because I know the person behind the shop, I can’t wait until I have the chance to support them.

Kristin Walters is a writer, crafter, and mother. Her shop, www.one9designs.etsy.com combines her passion for all three. Check out that site for personalized, hand-stamped sterling silver word jewelry in creative inspirational and family-related designs.

Myth-Busting the Mom Entrepreneur

Julie Cole LL.B, M.A is one of the founding Mom Entrepreneurs behind Mabel’s Labels Inc. (www.mabel.ca) and the mother of six.

Myth-Busting the Mom Entrepreneur

Maternity leave gives women the opportunity to step away — if only temporarily — from the traditional workforce. But suddenly, baby’s first birthday is around the corner and it’s time to start planning. The questions begin: Where will baby go to daycare? How will I transition to being a working mom?

Occasionally a strange phenomenon can occur at this point – Mama starts thinking about alternatives. Maybe she has an urge to stay-at-home or perhaps a small business idea which has been nagging at her seems possible. This is where more questions arise. The timing is perfect, but can it happen? What would her family think? How could they afford to have her drop out of the workforce? Is she willing to take the risk? Where would she start?

Speaking as a weathered Mom Entrepreneur, I thought it appropriate to share some of the Mabel’s Labels experiences. Over six years ago, Mabel’s Labels was created when I got together with three other moms and we put our clever little business plan into action. Mabel has felt like another child we have nurtured along with our other children.

We belong to a huge network of Mama customers, friends and entrepreneurs — here are some of the thoughts that swirl around taking the plunge into becoming a Mom Entrepreneur.

MYTH: I am going to have more time to spend with my beautiful children. I will be able to talk to customers while the baby naps, breastfeed while reading reports, and go on play-dates around meetings. I may even volunteer at the nursery school co-op a couple of mornings a week!

REALITY: While you may have more time with the children, you don’t actually have more time. What you now have is flexibility. Flexibility is what allows you to drop the kids off at school or go to the park in the afternoon. What it doesn’t do is get your work done and tuck you into bed at a decent hour. Trading time for flexibility has its drawbacks. The play-date you do in the afternoon equals sitting at the computer til the wee hours. The result is a pretty exhausted Mom Entrepreneur — which can make that activity you do with the kids less enjoyable for everyone.

As for thinking you will make phone calls during nap time — you may need to re-consider that one. If your children are like mine, they have an internal sensor that notifies them when there is an important phone call being made. In my experience, this career path is best suited to those who are not too hung up on getting sleep and are very functional without it.

MYTH: It will be fantastic to be my own boss and set my own rules. I won’t be accountable to anyone or have to report what I’m doing or where I’m going. Bring on the freedom!

REALITY: It’s true you are not likely going to fire yourself, but that is where the job security ends. If you’re not accountable to everyone you have business dealings with, the business will fail. So while there may not be one single boss breathing down your neck, there will be numerous other “bosses” who hold even more power — the ability to make or break your business. At Mabel’s Labels, our list of “bosses” is endless and includes customers, staff, suppliers, business partners, just to name a few. Suddenly one nagging boss doesn’t sound so bad, does it?

MYTH: I don’t have the money to start a business

REALITY: Clearly this aspect will be different for every business plan, but don’t assume that because you want to start a business it’s going to cost a bomb. Many Mom Entrepreneurs have started successful businesses on buttons and pocket lint. Women are not inclined to go to banks and get big loans to start a business. We prefer to hit up the people close to us – parents, husbands, partners, neighbours, innocent by-standers. Many successful Mom Entrepreneur start-ups are the direct of result of “love money.”

So before writing yourself off as an Entrepreneur, sit down and really budget what you will need to start your business. You may be surprised by the resources you can tap into.

MYTH: Working alone will be isolating. I’ll miss interacting with adults and the office social scene.

REALITY: You may not be attending power lunches or catching after work drinks on a Friday, but you are hardly alone. The Internet provides Mom Entrepreneurs endless opportunity to research, network, blog, message and Facebook. It allows you to communicate with customers, peers, colleagues, moms and experts. The best part is no one will ever know that you are doing it all from the comfort of your home while wearing pajamas soaked in sour milk. The Internet provides resources that never clock out. Once ensconced in the Mom Entrepreneur scene, you quickly discover the invaluable network the Internet provides both professionally and socially.

Is the Mom Entrepreneur lifestyle for you? That may be up for debate. It is certainly not for everyone and there is a lot to consider. For me the answer was clear — though you can often find me hunched over my computer well-past midnight, I wouldn’t trade foggy-brained afternoon playdates for anything.

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